Post - Sem Realizations

This post is a week late but, I've been wanting to write about everything for toooo long.
Because tooo much has happened and toooo much is happening.
And I really need to pause and process everything. Haha.

This is how our dining table looked during the finals week of last semester,
on the night before the deadline of all three final plates.
x_x

All throughout the sem, I was tired and sleep - deprived but still, I couldn't complain. Well, fine. I did complain but, I shouldn't have because it was my fault for choosing to get into so many non - academic activities. And I guess I was surviving. Haha. However, in the latter part of September, instructions for all the final requirements were given and the deadlines were set. After compiling it all in one neat list, I got totally overwhelmed.

It. Was. Just. Too. Much.

Do you know that feeling when you have a billion things to do but, you just can't do any of them? You just sit there and stare into space and think about which  plate to start working on or which paper to start writing. You contemplate on whether it's better to start studying for your org interview the next morning or your math finals the day after. Or if it's better to just stop everything and follow your heart... and chill with your friends or your family OR SLEEP, cause obviously that's all you wanna do. Haha!

Half the time, you're paralyzed, thinking about your game plan. You're just worrying or complaining about the amount of work there is but, it takes a while for you to actually DO anything. It's like you need just as much time for mental and emotional preparation, as for the actual execution of the tasks.

Well, at least that's how it is for me. :( I write the things to do again and again and break it all down to sub points, with the hopes that by doing so, the tasks will magically get.. uhm... easier and less scary. Haha. 

Oh yeah. What was both a blessing and a curse was the fact that I had to finish everything the day before the actual deadline because my sister and I had to leave for the airport at 3 AM on that fjdfalnmlmdk triple submission day... so, yeah.

Everyone was stressing out though. Not just me. You know that it's already finals week when the students start disappearing at the arki building. Haha. That's the indicator... it means everyone's "working" haha. There were many people suffering from Math 53, Physics 71 and Arch 4... subjects that will kill me later on in my UP Arki life. Haha.... anyway.
(Sorry I keep saying haha....)

"I lost count of how many times I've gone through the stress cycle wherein you have no idea how you're gonna pull something off at first and then you feel like you're on top of the world once you actually do."

That's what I wrote in my July blog. Imagine how many times we all went through the stress cycle since then... @-)

It feels as though it was just yesterday when I was freaking out about having to take 4 majors and panicking about how in the world I'd pull everything off.

And then, there was that beautiful, wonderful, awesome, amazing, moment... when I handed over my plates at 2:30 in the morning and thought...

"Oh my gosh. I did it."

Just like that and it's all over. I submitted the stress along with all the plates and sem break has been pretty great! For two weeks straight, I was basically in panic mode, working like a machine, with barely any sleep. (Except for the times I took naps that were ideally meant to be only 10 minutes long. Hehez.) and immediately after that, I went on a trip with my sister that made up for every single stressful moment in the past semester worth it. Hahaha.

 Isn't it weird? How fast life just switches from stress mode to chill mode and back? I can't get over it. I can't get over the fact that it's done... because honestly, I know that there are much harder things in life but... that was pretty challenging okay! :( So I'm just so, so, super happy it's done. Allow me to be happy before I start thinking of how difficult next sem will be haha.... huhu but, I guess I'll just have to take the same mindset with me. I just have to live with the awareness that whatever I'm going through is temporary. And because it's 10:09 PM and I'm getting sleepy, I shall just quote my old blog again hehehez

"Things pass. That's the lesson. No matter how stressed you are RIGHT NOW, it's going to pass. Your horrible schedule will only last for one semester and so will the reign of your terror prof. Haha! The tension you feel over an exam will vanish after you've taken it and it will be replaced by the best calmness in the world - which will also vanish when the next challenge arrives."

Again, I wanna end with my extremely effective note to self - and what I re-realized after seeing how it all panned out...

It always seems impossible until it is done.

Congrats to everyone. We're all one sem closer to getting out of college, yaaay! Heehee. Goodnight. :)

PS. I will never pray for a challenge again. Hahaha jk